Reflection

1:47am

I'm up right now fighting killer cramps and waiting for my tea to cool to a sip-able temperature. My head is beating throbs of pain like a heart, and all I want is for the pain to subside long enough for me to drift to sleep. I'll just wait the 13 minutes until the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air comes on. I can recite those episodes by memory. Sleep is near. But of course, like all other nights when I can't sleep, my mental gears turn.

It being so close to the new year, I can't help but reflect on the past year. This has been a crazy year for me, and I'm more than happy that it's over. Usually the year flies by without enough time to reminisce, but this year has moved at a slugs pace and carried me over every bump along the way. While it has been an awful year of hurt and disappointment, it has been a tremendous year of growth. It's a shame that It had to take so much for me to see my potential, but some people just need a swift kick in the behind. And that's what this year did. Kicked my butt until I finally GOT IT!

I lost friends. I acted before thinking. I gossiped. I lied. I was lied to. I got angry... a lot. I stopped praying. Mom got laid off. Dad didn't get any better. Money was tight. I stopped loving, for fear it would backfire again. I sold myself short. I did not love myself enough. I had to leave school, and I stained my credibility with people I love... to say the least.

But my skin got a little tougher, and I thank God for the trials. I lived, I learned, and I'm ready to start next year with this new found knowledge.

I await my fate for 2008.