More Like a Pop Quiz

I feel like I'm really being tested by God right now. Everyday I wake up with the mindset that this day is brand new. I'm not who I used to be, and I have no desire to go back there again. But every now and then it seems that as soon as Amen leaves my lips, the sincerity of what I prayed about is put to the test. More like a pop-quiz. It's always sporatic and can catch an unsuspecting person off guard. Than I have to make the conscious choice, am I really willing to make the effort to be a better person? Sometimes out of nowhere I might get a phone call , and someone tells me something that I REALLY don't want/need to hear. It might even be an arguement in the house with my parents. There's always something that has the potential to bring me down to such an angry or sad place. But the test now is can I rise above it? Sometimes I just want to say Bump this, I won't be the bigger person this time. Then juvenile mentalities and self indulged ideas come into play and try to take the place of everything I've worked so hard towards. It's a difficult thing to let go of yourself, and to be the person God really wants you to be. It's easy to lay back and snuggle in the blankets of old habits, but sooner or later you'll have to realize its time to get up and change those old sheets. So I did. It wasn't an easy task, but I take it day by day. The devil can use these little humps and manipulate them to his advantage, to make them become mountains that are bigger than the truth. So I stay prayed up, and ready. I'm at the stage now where all of my actions are very much concentrated on and intentional. I have to think about everything I say, before I say it, and choose my actions carefully. But God appreciates us being intentional because that lets him know we're thinking about him. I just can't wait till I don't even have to think about it, and it all just comes so naturally to me. Where my relationship is so tight its second nature to thank God, and praise Him, ask Him for advice, and spend time with Him like one of my friends. Because I know, if there is anything i've learned, the only person you can 100% count on, is God. And I'm learning that each day that passes.